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Money & Self-Worth

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Few subjects strain our personal self-worth more than financial problems especially as we experience manifestations and symptoms of those problems. The least problematic is embarrassment. The increased financial cost (fees & penalties), time spent on crisis management and to say nothing about the eroding credit or the often resulting higher interest rates are all very hard on our personal self-worth.

When in a financial crisis, and self-worth erodes too much, problems compound. We can get defensive, have excuses, blame others inappropriately, take up lifestyle habits that are not helpful and hinders eventual success.

Maintaining a healthy self-worth, whether the financial crisis is personal or in one’s business really can make all the difference in how well we come out on the other side. One of the biggest assets to maintaining a healthy self-worth when in trouble is that it helps maintain the confidence of others.Especially when it comes to bankers, creditors, customers and others critical to both the situation and a positive outcome.

A few suggestions when self-worth is straining:

Apply percentages to the source(s) of how we got to where we are. For example, if the problem isyour doing, then except it,but it is not likely all your doing. Severalcontributing factors or individuals likely contributed to the problem which iscreating this perfect storm. Your contributionmay be only a percentageof all factors.

Accept the fact that although you may not be 100% to blame, you might find it helps to accept full responsibility, be responsive and give leadership, leading the effected parties to a solution. Especially if the financial problems are yours.

Seek advice and check the ego. While using discernment in this area, sharing appropriately often has its dividends. Support often can come from the most unsuspecting places. Parents, siblings, adult children and employees, can often bring insights, ideasand strategies to the table that are invaluable. Afterall they are usually interested in you being successful. Rarely would you need nor want their money as a solution,but their encouragement and interest could give you what you will need to press on and win.

It’s okay to experience a full range of emotions. Allow it. Experiencing the emotions is usually a good idea. Acting out on some of them may not be a good idea though. At this point, it is probably okay to make promises to God you will never be able to keep. Be patient, stay standing and remember you are more valuable as you are about to receive a degree from the University of Hard Knocks.

Keep the parties involved together as much as possible. The journey becomes a learning process for all, not just for you. Everyone grows and, in the end, relationships usually deepen for a better next chapter.  Besides, you may want the people who helped you through your money crisis to be around to celebrate with youout on the other side.

When it comes to maintaining personal self-worth I the author will fix a focus on the adage “Trust is only a theory until we go through a valley to prove trust”. Even if outcomes are messy and far less than ideal the self-worth has been guarded and ready for “another day”. Best wishes and continued success with matters of your finance.

(John L. Housser)

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Financial Services Advisor

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